The Acceptable Number Of Times To Spank The Monkey During A Full Day Of Quarantine
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Look, I think all single guys have thought about it at some point during this quarantine, I just don’t think anyone had the idea to actually execute it in a blog. ‘What is the acceptable amount of times to whack off today?’
I don’t think there is any doubt that self-masturbation numbers are going through the roof due to social distancing and quarantine. Sites like PornHub are seeing box office type numbers on their pages and for good reason, there is nothing else to do. But at what point during this isolation is it considered out of control and just flat out not normal?
I think it is time somebody puts a well-educated number on this so we know going into each day what the threshold is that we should not be passing. I always felt a guy who plays a doubleheader every day of the week is really pushing it. I just really don’t think I have that type of stamina to be sending my soldier from down under out there into war 14 times a week. That’s just not fair to him or me. But as the days linger and slowly go by, that little soldier I have is being thrown through the ringer.
I have put a personal limit at three times a day just in case if I happen to wake up an hour earlier than normal that particular day. Under these rare circumstances, I think that’s fair. Anybody going above that benchmark of three is simply just out of control in my book and needs to be monitored or locked up. You are a different animal if you feel the need to debate me on that three times per day limit.
Right now, we need our soldiers more than ever and unfortunately, not everyone’s soldier is going to be a 2008 CC Sabathia and have the durability to go out there and give you a full 9 innings every time you get the ball in your hands.
Let’s make a mutual decision to set the limit at three and renegotiate these terms after what hopefully won’t be more than two months of the quarantine. On that note, I will be back for my next blog in about 12 minutes from now.
Carry on, carry on.
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Robby Berger, DMT.NEWS
